I have spent all day in the garden. I have weeded, planted, forked (that's forked..) watered, scratched to my hearts content. I now have no body. Or I have a body, but it won't move. It hurts. I can barely lift my cup of tea up. Seriously.

But enough of the humdrum. Lal. A perfect end to what was actually a really nice day.

He was bathed, drying, and left sitting on the bed, whilst I got his clothes and nappy out. Somehow he found the glasses case that K lost about 6 months ago and was happily talking to it, and playing with it.

I reached for a vest and heard a ridiculously loud scream. He'd attempted to circumcise himself using said glasses case. He poor little penis was still stuck in it. In the snappy bit! He was writhing over the bed, crying.. I got it off, picked him up, and he stopped.

He now has a large blood blister, with a tiny drop of blood coming from it, and a huge lump along the top, not the tip, of his penis.

Dammit. Why? I'm not usually quite so irresponsible. Well, ok.. I am. But I don't mean to be.

I can tell not much sleep will be had by me tonight.. I need to check that he can still wee. Not that I'm overreacting or anything.. but you know. I could actually now have a girl. And he'll have to be called Alexandra instead.

List of baby maiming so far:

Pyloric Stenosis: Scar on tummy.. Not so much my fault..

Hair caught around toe: Developed a form of Herpes.. Hospital stay required: My fault

Several head smacks against door frames: Damage not yet known: My fault

Home Castration/Circumcision: Possible failure to wee correctly: K's fault for needing glasses..

Grrrr

K x x