Sunday, 17 May 2009

What do you see?

Nothing much to report today. It rained a lot. There were many tantrums, from all of us. Lal is still not asleep as he repeated his falling asleep on the tv trick (8 minutes this time) G is still not tidying her room or feeding the cat. And I am about to go and watch the last episode of Lost. *stops to imagine Jack for a minute*

A couple of things though. I have decided to try to lose my lifelong inability to do anything crafty.. and have attempted to knit. And purl. It took me 8 hours straight, but I managed this:

It's pretty pathetic so far.. but already, in my head, I have decided that I am now an expert and this warrants me buying ever more expensive wool (that will sit in a dark cupboard forever more after next week. And in a few months that cupboard will become a no go area in case it reminds me of wasted money) - Oh.. it's a semi scarf in case you couldn't tell. With a stripe. Just one mind.

And the second thing?.. Umm, oh yes. We made pancakes for lunch. G has asked that people (you know, the billions who read this *sigh*) guess what shapes she could see..Photobucket (I see Snoopy at the top)

Photobucket (a drowning dog.. just managing to keep his head above pancake.. )

These pancakes amused her for hours. She is very disappointed that she only managed to eat 6. With whipped cream, sugar and lemon. 6.

K x

Friday, 15 May 2009

Too much Tv?

Lal has only just gone to bed again. My fault.. I allowed a 15 minute nap. I say "allowed" .. I actually made a cup of tea, turned round to check on him and discovered him asleep on the kitchen floor. He finally went to sleep tonight at 11.15. Far better than last night's 2.30 I suppose.

G has decided that the CVS jab contains a live cancer "bug" (because cancer is now a bug apparently) and has spent the last two days off school. Yes, her arm is still paralysed. Well it was until 6.30 when it and she made a miraculous recovery and was able to go to Cadets. She has passed all her first exams for it now, and is an official Cadet. One who *needs* a "95 shirt" to go with her camo trousers. It took an hour for me to discover that a 95 shirt is a camo shirt that was brought out in 1995. Not a special design or anything.. she could have told me, but that would be too easy for her.

And finally,as I'm shattered (and am "on" so have a hot water bottle on my tummy.. currently super heating my jeans button.. I should move it) I sort of semi worry about Lal's lack of proper speech. Although he has lots of word endings, they aren't really understandable to anyone but me. The health visitor wants him to see a speech therapist and I am to tell her if he makes any meaningfl progress in the meantime. (Pfft.. ignoring all that..)

I wonder if she'd be impressed with tonight's offerings...

*Lal runs through to kitchen from sitting room*
"Mama.. mama" deep breathe, look of intense concentration... " Carphone Warehouse.. seven teen five teen pee cent"
" Wow Lal, that's a good deal..."
*Lal runs back to sitting room.. only to appear 2 minutes later*
"Mama... Miss Lellie Kelly.."
"Want new shoes sweetie?"
*Back to tv, back to me again*
"Mama.. mama.. Cillit Bang all GONE" *claps hands* "Well done"

*sigh* The child can only speak in adverts. Does that mean he watches too much tv?

Oh, and just to shamelessly brag.. he can read most three letter words.. recognise all upper and lowercase letters, and can count to "two twenty one teen. "


G, on the other hand, can't pick an empty packet of crisps up off the floor because of her paralysed arm.

K x

Tuesday, 12 May 2009

From whine to wine..

I have nothing good to say tonight. Nothing. Lal has done nothing but whinge and whine and whinge and whine all day long. It's almost as if he resents me turning the laptop off and actually playing with him.

I shall break it down a little. He woke up, he whined. He got dressed, he whinged. He went to school.. he laughed, danced, clapped and sang. He came home from school, he whinged. All day. For every minute of said day.

By 6, he was exhausted.. he's not been well the last couple of days (ah yes.. he doesn't know how to tell the nursery people that he's been ill.. so informed them upon arrival that he had "bad cough".. he didn't.. but he's male and needs the attention. He then fake coughed for effect.) and so went to bath and bed at 6.30.

I was in the middle of my dance of joy, when G started moaning and whining and whinging. She has tummy ache. She had the third CVS jab at school today, so her right arm is paralysed. Yes. Paralysed. She physically *cannot* carry her school bag upstairs or pick her clothes up off the floor. I looked up the side effects online and showed her that laziness isn't listed. Nonetheless, she is doing the dying swan thing on the sofa. She thinks that she "can manage" to eat some fish fingers, banana and whipped cream and toffee popcorn (no, not all at once) if I make them for her. She doesn't think she can manage anything healthy though. The paralysis prevents it.

So. My day. Of whinge, whine and something else beginning with "w" so I can alliterate. I know. Wine. I shall finish it off with wine.

K x

Monday, 11 May 2009

Who needs men?

It's a question I often ask myself.. especially after all the problems K and I have had. I can usually do most things around the house. I can paint, fill holes.. fish toys out of the toilet. I can hoover spiders. Remove things from the loft. Build bookcases from the flat pack hell place.
I even made our boring plain wood wardrobe doors into masterpieces by gluing cornicing type stuff on them. (Ok.. so I can do it.. doesn't mean I have to actually know the technical names)

And if I can't do things I can bodge them so they look semi done. For example:

  1. Cat flap door broke - I created a new one from the lid of a pizza box and a drawing pin. Cat could only come in through it.. but I left the window open for her to go out.
  2. Baby proofed larder door - Piece of ribbon in the shutty bit.. Lost tops of fingers a few times, but it worked.
  3. Dog chewed corner of wallpaper (the chunky wallpaper) off at the top of the stairs - crumpled A4 (several sheets) and a coat of paint and you can only tell when you look at it.
Things like that. I can do that.

Today, K bought Lal a trike. With parent handle. He is away (it was delivered today, bought last week) and I decided that I could assemble it myself. I think I did an excellent job. It took me a few hours longer than planned. But most of that time was spent looking for a spanner and a thingy head screwdriver. Again, I did an excellent job. Look at it in all it's glory..


Fine. So Lal was riding it when the wheel fell off. But that is part of the triking experience.

I say again. Who needs men?

K x

Sunday, 10 May 2009

Obessions and stuff

As anyone who speaks to me for more than 15 seconds knows.. I have a small, almost insignificant nappy obsession. It's not out of control yet, I can go up to 15 minutes at a time without looking at Nappy sites.. but no more than that. The obsession has spread lately to include woollen nappy covers, otherwise known as longies, shorties and crops. Or board shorts. I think boyish crops are known as board shorts.. but I can't be sure so daren't say that out loud for fear of sounding like a fool. Or more like a fool.

So I'm going to share some pictures.. All Lal obviously.. G doesn't seem enthused by these things.. and she's still not speaking to me after I bought her her own reusable sanitary pads. She thinks she needs the local mental ward on speed dial in case I flip any further..

Photobucket Photobucket


You see? Cuteness personified! The boy isn't bad either.

And in other news.. My father appeared with a hammer at 10.30 this morning. It wasn't for an attempt to kill us all.. but to put together an arch for the garden that has been sat in a corner for the last 5 years.. By 4pm it was finished.. and without him having a heart attack. G decided that she would love to creosote it.. it looked like fun. She lasted 6 minutes before it became too much like work and a mortal splinter wound forced her inside to watch TV. The arch will now remain half painted until judgement day. And I hate the thing. It is huge, unsafe (dad isn't a master craftsmen.. you sit on the left of it and the right semi buckles.. He said to market it to K as a swing *sigh*) and just looks odd!

Oh, and at 3pm today. Lal went upstairs. He fell asleep for an hour. A phrase that strikes terror wherever it is heard. He's been forced to do laps of the garden, and has been taken to the park twice. I just know he won't fall asleep before 11. Why doesn't he listen to me? Naps are *not* allowed.



Saturday, 9 May 2009

The Wheels on the Bus...

... had better not stop.

Lal and I went to town today. The unthinkable had happened and we were out of Gingerbread an emergency trip was necessary. G and friend decided not to join us.. because, you know, they would have had to walk for a mile and a half to get to the shops. They preferred the 2nd choice of staying home, walking to chip shop and spending their pocket money on lunch.

So, Lal and I set off. About 75m in, my legs started aching.. and as luck would have it, a bus was coming our way. I decided, for the third time since Lal was born, to give public transport a shot. (They let me down badly the last two times... no room for Biggest Pram in the World first, and Too Small Doorway on the second occasion.) On we got, paid for my ticket (£1.50 for a 6 minute trip.. daylight robbery) and off we went.

There were lots of lovely old people on it already, all of whom cooed over the boy and appreciated his woollen trousers.. and then I felt it. And heard it.

I may have mentioned before that Lal has a few teeny, tiny issues. Well a newish one is that he cannot be in traffic. You simply cannot allow the car to stop else he screams, cries and whines. It is a little distracting. So today, when I felt and heard the bus slowing down at the end of our road, I braced myself for the inevitable.

He didn't disappoint. Screaming. crying tears. "No Stop.. raffic. Nooooooooooooo" The old ladies to the back of us asked me what was the matter. I explained, quite loudly, as I needed to be heard over the screams. I assured them that he would stop as soon as we started moving again. Which he did.

There are 6 sets of traffic lights and one junction before the bus reached our stop. We got stuck in one small line of traffic whilst we waited for an inconsiderate fool to turn right..(screaming hysteria) but were quite lucky really. We coasted through the first two sets of lights without stopping, at the third there were tears, and people were starting to laugh at the boy.. I'm not exaggerating, it really was like clockwork... engine starts to idle.. Lal starts to scream.

As the 4th set of lights approached...the bus driver said, "They're turning red.. what shall I do?" "Creep slowly towards them... just don't let the bus stop.." And bless him, he did.. we approached the lights at about 1 mile per hour.. Lal remained quiet. Got stopped at the next set.. Lal screamed.

By now, people on the bus were crying with laughter. It was like we were reenacting "Speed" .. Personally, I think ours is a far better version.

I can safely say that this was the very best bus ride I have ever experienced. They applauded him off the bus (to save their ear drums) and one lady gave him £2..

Public transport attempt number 3 was a success..

K x

Friday, 8 May 2009

Disco night..

G has a school disco tonight. Somehow, despite her being grounded for using the phone for 3 hours*, she is there. She also seems to have a friend staying over for the night. That child can wrap her father round her little finger. *sigh*

We had the usual angst of no clothes, hair that won't go the right way, tights with ladders in them. I only interferred once. She likes the clumpy mascara look. Usually, I find a way to subdue her and forcibily remove it.. tonight I merely suggested that she remove a little.. as she had a very fetching "blink" line on the top of her eyelids. She sulked and told me that I know nothing. I expected that.

The friend is lovely, a little quiet in front of me, but then my endless sarcasm and largely successful attempts at embarrassment can be a little wearing after a while.

G is 13 now, and somehow, far more grown up that I was at that age. Frankly, it scares me.. so for dinner we had takeaway. Pizza to be exact.. with a double order of garlic bread. That should put off any potential suitors. *insert devil emote*

So. They are at the disco, I need to collect them at 9.30. They will then stay up all night talking, be told 42 times to shh and finally be threatened with execution if they wake Lal. My plan is to stalk various websites in the hope that I can spend some money that I don't have. And watch TV.


* OMG.. did I not mention this? I went upstairs on Sunday night to make sure she was in bed and asleep.. only to discover her on the phone.. to a BOY! The same boy she had her first ever date with last year. The display on the phone read 03:13.. meaning that she had been on the phone fpr OVER THREE HOURS.. and the best bit? TO A MOBILE. Oh, there was shouting in our house on Sunday night.

Monday, 4 May 2009

Bath time

Who needs a bed when you can go for the comfort of bubbles?

Lal was a little tired tonight..